oh you

I think I have a poem somewhere called that.

Well its back to work day. I'm not exactly sure whats on the actual work agenda, or what time I will get out. Me and Becky are hoping to go to the Flobots concert tonight. I would really like to see them, but oh well. I have become more accepting of not attending concerts (maybe since my hearing died).

As far as the last post: Um a brother needs to vent and this is my space to do so, whenever the hell I feel like it. I'm glad some of yall like to keep me in check. I'm glad some of yall are nice enough to say you care. I appreciate all that thank you. But sometimes I gotta get my insecurities out or they drive me crazy. Generally I do think I have been a bit more pessimistic lately... and hopefully that will change. I think the structure of work will help. I think some things have already started helping.

My Mom and little brother are probably flying out to Cali to help my Grama pack up all her shit and move here (in the next week). This will be a world of difference. In my mothers words "I haven't spent more than two consecutive weeks with your Grandma since I was 18." (34 years)
I'm not sure what it will mean for me. I imagine more family obligations. In many ways it will be good for everyone. But I'm not sure that my mom will actually worry about her less... as MN winters and whatnot tend to leave people in a rough spot.

My little brother by the way was forced to move home by my parents who are now regulating his life. No substances. No sleeping in. Must find work.
I looked at my room (he now lives in it). It looked weird with all his stuff. It is very possible my mom will move him so that my Grama can live in that room while she is transitioning to her apartment.

I need to work on finishing sentences and thinking ideas out.
I also need to work on asserting myself with confidence.


"Put you hands up high if you haven't abandoned the hope that the pen' strokes stronger than the cannon." ~flobots