It’s midnight, I’m still angry. Angry about violence. Angry about racism. Angry about my country and neighborhood being defiled. Angry about evil. Angry about evil being wrapped up in patriotism and being mislabeled truth or justice or whatever the fuck. Especially when the orange doesn’t even bother coding his bullshit. Take over a country, kill a mom, free a drug dealer or a scam artist, hide a child abuser. Meh… that’s America, tomorrow a mass shooting, the next day a new scandal.
Angry that I’m allowing myself to be lured into trolls and angry that misinformation is so easily believed. Angry that I’m losing myself to hatred, rather than focusing on what is good, what is right, what is beautiful.
I’m scared, I’m hurt, I’m disappointed. I’m furious. But my anger doesn’t serve a purpose tonight. So I need to treat it like a baby and take care of it. Tomorrow, maybe let it out again if it’s directed in the right place. Tonight be gentle with it.
I’m proud of my people, but I hate that it feels like an us vs them. It shouldn’t be this way.
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