What ta do

Been enjoying this song for a while.


I find that each verse has me considering a different life question and I love it.
Although in the song he has conclusions, or seems to imply the questions are more like statements "I will be light". I find I am continually coming back to these questions.

What does it mean to be free? To be part of a community? To love someone? To serve God? or... I guess how do you be light?
and all this considering we have one tiny moment in life to shine. 

This week I've been particularly caught in the first few questions.
I worked Sunday through Thursday with the intention of Writing on Friday-Sun (this coming weekend) before next week's shifts. On most work days I am exhausted after work and I get home right around dinner time and want to just do nothing... but this week I had the opportunity to catch up with some friends, and I was looking forward to that. So a couple of the nights I went out for dinner with some homies and had a good time, even though I was reluctant to take it further into the evening. But as the week went on, I found more people reaching out to hang out this weekend, and my potential time to do some writing seems to be shrinking.

So I've been running into this thing of how do I justify protecting my writing time?  If my normal day doesn't allow me to connect too well, and most people can only hang on the weekend, then how do I ensure I see people and also have some time for writing?

Furthermore, why is the writing important?  I am writing a book, but where is it going, what will it be, is it important? to who? why?

If it is just for me, then why is that important?
If it is for others, then, is that an act of love and how do I justify it?
Is creating art justifiable if you can't show the outcome regularly...

anyway... I don't think I really have this figured out.

But in my head, I need to spend this time... and I find myself willing to cut out time with people I care about to get it done. Its weird.

Or maybe I am really less caring than I used to be?
I don't know what that means.