"right"

I have soooo much paperwork to do, and yet I am watching a protest happening a 1.5 miles or so from my apartment.

Sometimes I am not sure what my job is.
Am I supposed to be helping kids conform?
Helping be more themselves?
Guiding their behavior to be acceptable?
Teaching them and their families to accept themselves?
Reminding them of the gray. Reminding them of the boundaries?

Some of the families I work with function better. Some don't.
Kids go to the hospitals. Insurance denies our services.
Parents don't call back. Kids don't choose to change their situations.
What control do I have over any of this?

I try my best and ask them to do the same.




What is my life? I mean really... does it matter? Does it need to?
I could get covid and slip away easily. Maybe I have skin cancer or stomach cancer. Or a fungal infection. Maybe I'll get hit by a car or die in my sleep.

When does life start feeling like it matters again for my selfish ego?

I miss having a partner. Someone to remind me I matter daily. That would be nice. I am not really giving enough credit to my friends and family with this post. They reach out every day even though I suck at doing that. They are pretty much always awesome. I am the spoiled one.