odd dreams

Well I had planned to write a lot more on here.... and then a month went by.


The first thing I remember was that I was slightly paranoid.  A girl was reading across the street, but we were dialoging, it was as if she were reading the narrating voice of my head, and I was thinking responses to her. I didn't know what she looked like. There may have been others in on the conversation, which seemed to be an incredibly important discussion of some world changing topic... but i was hungry.  I walked across the street approaching the girl who was reading, and the guy who lingered around her, perhaps her body guard, perhaps her boy friend.  As I approached I tried to look both at her face, and also at the book title... and recognized neither. 

I was chuckling to myself. The items on my grocery list were few, and weird. 
I wanted chocolate, I wanted some sort of fruit candy, I wanted a fruit punch. This was dinner. 
After picking up those three items I headed to another section and saw my brother Steve. He didn't say anything and he moved further into the store, but I was trying to joke with him from across the aisles about one of the items I was buying... the last item I thought I went there for was like a teriyaki sauce with the orange label. 
But while I was looking for it, I stumbled upon the valentines candy section and got sidetracked... just in case I thought, I should look to see what they have.
I was looking for chocolate with caramel in it, but they had a chocolate toffee kind that I settled for, and I remember I had to open some packages and adjust things for them, then clean up the mess... and this is how I got to my room... the scene gradually changed from a grocery store aisle (narrow with shelves) to a narrow bedroom in my fathers old apartment, where the shelves were our bunkbeds and I was cleaning the room.  I was about to get settled in when i noticed the family in the hall outside the door... when I looked over the sense of paranoia returned and I think I saw a mad stabbing another man( like a weird illusion), but I generally ignored it and went to talk to my family. They were on alert too, they wanted to know what my plan was... and I said that I generally just wanted to hide out and maybe read tonight.  I returned to my bed, preparing to read, when I heard more commotion, someone said someone was waiting for me, but people were coming and going from the apartment, and suddenly I was much older and instead of protecting my brothers and parents (or them protecting me), I was suddenly the father, or the older man... and I wanted to make sure whoever was at the door was ok... so I kept looking out the window, and then through the door hole view... (can't remember words right now).
Around this time, I got a call from my coworker who left a voicemail that i could only somewhat understand (due to the commotion in the apartment), she was saying "Mike that guy Matt Schealle or whatever, you were right he isn't a good guy. I talked to some friends and did a little research and... its much worse than you think. You should be very cautious, this is a real situation..." (and more but it was hard to make out).
For some reason I had been assuming "Matt" would be discreet in his killings. I was expecting an assassin, perhaps a sniper, or an assault out of nowhere.

I opened the door to the hall, and saw one of my students running away. I called out to them, suddenly realizing that I had left them waiting for me for what must have been hours... and they slowly returned crying. At first it was the same student (a white student who is very young). But then it changed to a black student and two of her family members. She was still crying, but now all three of them were dressed up like they were going out to a fancy restaurant or something. They had expected me to go, and I felt really bad that they waited so long... so bad that I briefly considered going and reviewed the places in the neighborhood... but I couldn't fathom getting dressed up to the degree that they had (they had spent hours getting ready), and I felt like a slob. I was only going to appease them, but I felt like I would embarrass them by going.
I apologized again and wished them a good night. The older two (a sister and mom?)  gave me a look like they thought the whole thing was crazy in the first place and that my response was normal... where as the student still looked upset, but left anyway.
I shut the door and went to the window.

The view had changed... I was looking out the window from my Mom's house in SLP. the view was from my window in bed, and I was trying to be discreet. Look out to see who was spying on me. Who could see me in my little upstairs window? 
THe  street at first was thick with snow, people were trudging through it, cars were barely making it...but then more and more people started approaching towards our house... like a concerted effort... and some of them had weird things in their hands, boxes that glowed, costumes... weird shit.
a bus pulled up and some fully dressed klansmen got out, and I suddenly realized what was going on. The weird shit in their hands were crosses and stuff to burn... I got scared and ran to my Mom's room, she was asleep in her bed and I woke her up yelling the kkk are here for us. At first she didn't seem distressed, just "are they actually doing anything?" so I looked out the window again from her room and saw that they had lit some things on fire and were performing a ceremony of some kind. 
I ran to steve's room but when I looked in, it seemed like a jungle gym of obstacles. I figured it would take some effort to wake steve up, so I decided to wait until it was necessary. I went back to my Mom's room, the ceremony was reaching the climax and I watched as these strange boxes mechanized and transformed... the crosses were set up in the center of a larger box, that contained what at first seemed to be water, but might have been oil or gasoline. There were two of them at the far end of the driveway and more boxes between us. THese other boxes started transforming too, sometimes spectacularly, liked flinging gas at the crosses, causing explosions that seemed timed and designed. Like a fireworks show.  Eventually the klan started leaving... and it occurred to me to start taking pictures... but the screen on my mothers window kept me from getting good shots... 
the boxes kept transforming, eventually they packed themselves up and a large crate stood in our driveway. It didn't look particularly harmful, but symbolically was a pretty big presence... and they just left it. 

I was still taking pictures only now, I could tell that somehow I was taking pictures of inside the bus. The pictures acted as a sort of credits (like for a movie), and these klansmen revealed themselves slowly... some of them had been minor characters, people at the grocery store... some of them were people my Mom knew, some were powerful people that could do a lot of damage... it was like these photocredits were enlightening us to the idea that our problems weren't over, and yet, that this was the "thing" I was waiting for... it wasn't an assassination, it was a klan rally in my driveway.


Anyway... then my roommates came home and I woke up.