I cant even explain it all...
its just like heart break and too much weight.
and it feels really exhausting already, and it makes me even more reluctant to do holiday shit.
and it feels like I can't say anything because then I'm just moping and not trying to work through it... but it was hard enough to get out of bed and now I don't even want to think.
UHHHHHHH
I feel like I am the worst son ever.
life pulls too many directions at once sometimes.
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I want people to understand how miserable I am right now... but I can't say anything or explain it right.
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