Flowings of Your Everlasting Taffyman

I know what you're all thinking.... but im not gonna...freak out!

I came to write about new years.. past and present
for tonight I spent the actual event in a car driving from minnetonka to St paul, listening to my friend nona and some of her cats jamming out on songs she wrote, but that I had first heard performed by lex and joe.
before that I watched a movie with my dad and colleen... before that i had lunch and a movie with my brothers...
all in all not a bad day, but i assume most of yall had more spectacular nights.

so lets talk about some past new years...

well I distinctly remember one other year i was in a car, we were stopped at a red light, a caravan of cars in the middle of down town searching for a party, and we watched the fireworks over minneapolis. I believe the year before I was huddled in a small hotel room with a gathering of friends, but not enough to drink the wine or the champaign...

last year was in india, a group of us and some activist peoples we had been getting lectures and tours from. I watched emily play the keyboard, I watched people drink beer, I took pictures, we were all dressed up. I was sad, but happy for everyone else so I faked it.

4 years ago I wasnt awake, alone in a hostel in avignon france, I hadnt talked to anyone in days, I had no roommates, I tried to call my friends and found them mid day preparing for what would turn in to THE PARTY I missed... the one where everyone got drunk, where every room was spewed upon where every person left thinking "man I shouldnt have had so much" where it became apparent that they dont actually need me around to drive them home or take care of them anymore.

before that were numerous years where the group of us would stress about where to go, or who would have the party, we usually ended up at petes, a small group of us, like the time that thing happened on the bathroom rug and maybe in the laundry room... or someone elses but never what we expected, and though disappointed we had our closest friends near.

some new years were spent in sioux falls, banging pots and pans around my uncle's neighborhood, late night games of monopoly, we drank soda water and lemon juice, we ate popcorn and candy. and I always felt out of place... though surrounded by my family.

I was supposed to celebrate with Illy tonight, but that fell through, still -new years was never my favorite holiday...