Flowings of Your Everlasting Taffyman

its funny, after 6 months of complaining.... i finally shut up, and thus stop posting... so content, so happy with everything...
Today I met Illy's grandparents a lovely english couple (i'll throw in jewish because its so prominent in their lives, where as often its not something i would make excessively known) anyway... I met her grandparents and sat down with her gramps who kept exclaiming that i looked very familiar like someone he had once known, and he wondered about my family... it was really nice and clean and for some reason felt a lot like heaven to me... looking through their window at the apartment building's pool. the glass statues in the glass display case, the books on the table... their comfortable couch and clean carpet... her gramps was worried about his age and health. Illy says hes a bit of a drama king. I wonder if G-d is that way, wondering, worrying, complaining about this and that... and i hope that he makes me an angel cuz like lex with my gramps, it felt really nice to sit and listen, to reassure and be reassured.
They told me i have the face of a good teacher.

I let him believe my gramps was also a gunner on a destroyer in the war, though i really just meant to say he was on a destroyer.
small differences- that mean nothing compared to a man who feels a glimmer of connection to a world he sees slipping away.
heaven is nice place and connection.

maybe thats why i am so happy. i feel like im connected again... though its hard and weird to figure out schedules. But the people i connect to dont seem to feel the same way as Me... somehow due to the place and position they currently inheret i seem a strange oddity -not struggling like they do and in someways it puts me at distance.... though not something to be striving for... more the exception the oddity.

i wish i could pull off the old peace-chillax-flow-smooth calm-meditate bullshit too complex and too simple to be of any good in trying times...

the future of course is unknown, my fortune cookie said that my luck will soon change... and my luck has been awesome so im preparing...
and you should too cuz im sure this blog will have all the ranting/

but until thanks for all the happiness.
peace and love
to you
taff