Flowings of Your Everlasting Taffyman

Repacking the old bag


Actually I threw out my suitcase, this is about e mails...
I went through probably a hundred or so old e mails. some from as long ago as last summer, some as recent as a few days. I guess I felt like it was part of moving on... why save e mails when you can talk to the person face to face in a matter of hours?
I promised both lex and becky e mails tonight, my last night with wireless till Im home (i assume, i dont actually know about london)
Now i find myself tired, exhausted really from the travels... but even more, from months of emotional e mails.. the best and worst of the most significant source of anything in my life...
my brothers, my friends from childhood, jr high, highschool, college, travel... my parents, my former girlfriend my current girlfriend. People I adore, sharing secrets, reflections, jokes and poems. Sometimes the titles themselves revealed the content, sometimes 7 paragraphs in I was pushed through a time portal back to a terrible-worry filled night, or a brilliant exciting wonderful suprise.
I clung to certain e mails more so than others, fearing the loss might mean the relationship was gone... which in some ways has been the case in the past (I rarely use address books, so when that last e mail is deleted and they dont write again...its over)
I felt very free when I started but like always giving up the past is never easy for me, and as more and more tears and smiles frequented my face, I became more and more unsure of what i was doing... pressed on.

what do i say? thanks for writing, it was life changing, and life saving.
thank you