Flowings of Your Everlasting Taffyman

Oh my god!! what is my deal? this is the second day in a row i have gotten no homework done. Its simply not cool. I sit here all night long listening to music and exploring facebook, my pics, e mails, poetry, art websites, funny websites, blogs and journals blah blah blah
I have a simple paper to write and cant work up the motivation. It sucks cuz i want to do fun things and i dont think i should unless i get something done...

other than that though, things may be better. Im worried about someone, Im excited to see Illy, I need to talk to gabs, I want to see my brothers and go out to eat with them, I want a social life, and I want to hang out with my friends new and old. I dont want to do homework, i dont want to be in school. I dont want to have to worry about events. I want to be eventless, so i can paint all night long and watch movies and rock out and have beautiful conversations with beautiful people. I want to take pictures of them and thank them.
I want to explore, I want to not be sick. I want to write poetry and have something to write. i want to do a radio show on KUMM
i want to start acting again, or doing improv or public freak outs or something creative I want to travel. I want to make up speeches and give them in front of audiences and have them take notes even though i am making up the info. I want relationships and i want freedom, I want love and support, and i want to give it, i want to dabble with things that arent okay for me to dabble with and test the waters limits and such.
I want the idea of fences to be a temporary thing.



I want to experience life, not have it happen while I hold back and cling to things i should do.
I dont want regrets. I dont want pain that diminishes my love. I want to love and love freely and openly. without worry of people getting hurt, without morals, I want the beauty of sharing wholeness, like carrying the bricks without the weight. I want the strength again to be nurturing. I crave beauty, excitement, wonder, extreme, happiness, joy, but also passion, animal like, filthy beautiful, music overwhelming, connectedness, rush of flowing waves, warmth with a breeze.