New Beginnings

I was hanging with Lyda last night and while attempting to talk about the projects and hobbies I hope to start/continue I said that they are sort of like teen dreams I never accomplished.

A cd- let's make it a tape of recordings... and then I can hand out Walkmans for people to listen to it (so exclusive)

A book - let's make it something obscure and science fictional so that no one is interested.

A painting - let's put it on a website or hang it in a small coffee shop gallery near the bathroom so no one will look... 

And after that maybe I can get back on a track where I care about the world in a meaningful way, a way in which I desire to contribute to the solutions.

But until then I don't want the responsibility, it creates a pool of dread and resistance somewhere in me, very similarly to when I was a teenager. 

So new beginnings, yes but also quite familiar.

Woke up at 7:20 to go for a walk with my Dad, he slept in accidentally. I am le tired.